THE ONENESS OF MARRIAGE
Today, Marlie and I celebrate twelve years of marriage, that is 4380 days. Our oldest brother is also celebrating his 20th year of marriage this very Sunday; now, you can do the math in term of days. One of my other brothers celebrates his own wedding anniversary tomorrow and one of our youngest sisters celebrates next week. Hence, the month of November is quite special to many of us. For me, feels truly like a month of love. In fact, I have fallen in love with the entire fall season, the cool breeze and the falling of the leaves and the peaceful nature of the entire season, no doubt this is “la saison d’amour”.
Marriage is not an easy undertaken, it is not something to kid with. This is a serious commitment which should not be taken lightly but with great care and humility. Clearly, there is no such thing as a season of love. Perhaps, fall might have been the most reasonable time for us all, perhaps a mere coincidence that we all tied the knot within days of each other’s anniversary. As for me, it was truly the greatest opportunity in my entire life, and I submitted to it absent of any hesitation. Whether it was Fall, Winter or Spring I would have said “i do” to my bride within any seasons. Our marital success has had nothing to do with any of this world’ concepts rather all credit to Yahweh. For, He’s blessed us with knowledge, power to good will to endure in the face of all circumstances. Indeed, marriage is the institution of God Himself, and He will that they succeed.
God has not left us in the dark when it comes to marriage rather has given us a complete guide through His Living Word as the ultimate blueprint for success.
Please take a trip back with me into the Garden of Eden. In what is considered the very first marriage in creation, God the father walked Eve down the aisle to join her soulmate. Adam who had been schooled, groomed given many of God’s own responsibilities, tending to the garden, caring for God’s own creation was truly ready for that moment. Thus, Adam a well-developed, mature and unbroken vessel, was ready to cleave to His spouse no matter the circumstances that awaited them in their journey through life, they’d be equipped to survive as one flesh.
Adam had been in a deep sleep, one would have thought that he’d be a bit off, confused, hesitant or maybe consumed with fear at the site of the women. Yet, as she approached, he was truly convinced that this was his other half. He Leaped off the ground, exclaiming “this is now bone of my bones, flesh of my flesh”, “she should be called woman, for she was taken out of man” Genesis 2:2 KJV.
This brings me back to November 6th 2020, as I celebrated my tenth years of marriage on that roof top in the Williamsburg section of downtown Brooklyn, I too had an similar moment. I was truly emotional, consumed with tears, tears of joy as I contemplated the beauty of my bride being walked down that aisle. I could truly feel every fiber of her soul within my own being as my own bones and my own flesh. I came to that same realization all over again, that God has given her to have and to hold from that day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part, for all eternity.
Even after ten years, my responsibility is to follow that same command to leave my parents and to cleave to my companion as one flesh in what is termed now known as the “Oneness of Marriage”. Knowledge of the Godly institution is much more powerful than any marital counseling I’ve ever had. You see, unless two distinct individuals can wholeheartedly adhere to one another, they have yet to enter the Godly union of marriage; for, one flesh they shall be! For this reason, the word of God collectively calls them Adam as seen in Genesis 5:2 KJV.
Finally, we’ve placed so much emphasis on the cleaving process, for its truly essential and consequential. Yet, the most effective policy when it comes to marriage is that one must “leave”, “exit”. Exiting out of one’s comfort, separating from parents in all manners, physically, emotionally, and financially remains the most meaningful element for success as a couple.
Likewise, the Godly parents knows that very truth and facilitates the departure of the newly wed. For, letting go of our children upon marriage is the greatest gift that we can offer them. Once out of the door, it should be made clear that they are not welcome back under any circumstances. Perhaps only temporary in the event of a flood or fire. For, once they know they cannot return, they are more likely to work out their troubles.
Of course, marriage isn’t easy, the first five years is usually trouble, usually the most difficult period from family interference to financial headaches as well as problems with intimacy. Yet, these are no reasons for married couples to run back and forth to mom and dad, rather it’s time that they kneel in front of the Almighty within the confine of their own homes crying out to the Almighty Yahweh and the Christ Yahushua who is the Head, the Counselor, the Guide of the family, the Author and the Finisher or our faith.
On this Sunday November 6th, 2022, I want to wish my beautiful queen a happy anniversary. May the Almighty continue to fill you with His amazing and overwhelming blessing in the name of Jesus.
Kelly Hilaire
Minister